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  • Writer's pictureWTAHealth

NO FOUL LANGUAGE, said no God ever....

Updated: Aug 28, 2021

I pray with curse words! I do, and my Higher Power (HP) does not give a shit. My HP, who I choose to call God, does not need me to pray in any certain way, God wants authentic, vulnerable, loving, camaraderie with me. Not some bullshit, kneeling on Sunday, hands folded, head bowed, "act the part" kind of relationship. We're hashing it out daily. It's an open, honest exchange and my language does not disqualify me from the blessings,

I am convinced that many people are uncomfortable praying because they don’t know what to say other than their wish-list or keeping it rote, flowery and "holy". We must learn HP language in order to successfully communicate. That language is LOVE.

Some days, I use the opposite of God's language, a true FOUL LANGUAGE...these are words that I use AGAINST myself. If someone were to say, "can you please watch your language", I may be tempted to say in return, "you think that's foul language, you should hear how I talk to myself".

After lots of inner work, I have come to know that shit talking myself (& others) is either:

a) power grab from God

b) a disempowering weapon.

Both sever my spiritual connection, and now I'm fucked.

I digress. Let me take you back into the "story of Dawn' for some context-

As a sporty-spice, athletic kid, I loved to trash talk. It was keenly aware of how my words distracted the opponent form their task, and more on me. It was direct, it was private, almost intimate. But often, in those same games, I would also trash talk myself, same directness, same private intimacy.

"Don't miss that ball"... hence I'd drop the ball..

"I suck. Coach is going to pull me and I'm going to lose the starting spot", "My speed will win their approval".... and down the rabbit hole I go.

My buy in and the accompanying emotions fueled my dis-ease, and now I am hyperventilating, literally (We called it "exercise induced asthma" at the time).

Now I have single-handedly pulled MYSELF from the game. Wasn't that my biggest fear?? WTF!

Sounds pretty harsh, right? Or maybe it sounds all-too-familiar. This type of “trash-talk” is common, and we all do it to some extent. In fact, people often engage in several forms of doubt/negative thinking, called cognitive distortions. These automatic thoughts are normal (everyone does it) but ultimately counterproductive. They’re called “automatic” because they occur subconsciously and quickly—within .2 seconds after the event that triggers the negative thought (e.g., a missed catch or overeating). In fact, research has found that those who envision a bright future, compared to those who have negative expectations of the future, are less likely to have high blood pressure, high cholesterol and even obesity. Well shit!

Joan Pastor, PhD, is a licensed organizational and clinical psychologist, suggests we step in and take charge of our mean brain. Here’s one of the simplest and most effective ways to do this:

  • Identify a negative thought or trash talk.

  • Develop a counteracting loving thought. If you find this tricky, remember that this can be any positive thought, even if it’s not related to your trash talk.

  • Use the following approach, called “cognitive restructuring"

Let this template for cognitive restructuring be a new prayer.....

  1. Let yourself experience the negative thought fully.

  2. Tell yourself to STOP thinking that negative thought.

  3. Replace it with the counteracting loving thought. (God language)

Repeat this "Prayer" daily for 21 to 30 days in a row. This exercise will allow your loving thought to become a habit, and more like a prayer over time.



Current Prayer Life Mood
What the fuck am I going to be when I grow up? Please send Angels- Amen

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